At about half past nine I loaded the garlands and my clog and kit bag into my car. When I switched on the ignition the computer went through its checks and flagged up the message "OIL LEVEL LOW - TURN OFF YOUR ENGINE". It's due a service but I didn't really believe there was a problem. The car has lied before.

The last time was in February when I had the handbrake fixed and all the brake pads replaced. It kept bleeping at me and flashing "BRAKE PADS WORN GO TO A GARAGE". The first time it happened I went back to Kwikfit, who double checked and confirmed all was well (at no charge).

But for a while it kept doing it. Most memorably on a hairpin-bend on a 3in1 going down the cliff to Llangrannog in Cardiganshire. Just to add to the fun there was a car coming up so I had to stop and reverse back up into the inside of the bend. Llangrannog is a very picturesque little seaside village and well worth a visit, but my advice is to take the 'bus and lorry' road not the 'cars only'. Having driven me to distraction for a while it has stopped telling me my pads need changing.

However, back to Saturday.

I wasn't prepared to risk driving to Morpeth so drove round to Kwikfit and explained the problem. While I waited for the lad with the rag I 'phoned the Squire and explained the situation. The lad with the rag checked the oil three times, and it was half full each time. He put it up on the ramp and could find no leak or other problem. I told them my car tells lies and they told me to have it checked out by a dealer just in case it was a fault with the oil pump (unlikely but possible).

Of course it's stopped doing it now. But by the time I got up to Morpeth the roads were closed for the procession and I had to take the diversion route to the school grounds we park in. I had a nice walk by the river, humping the garland and other bags, and got to the Town Hall just as the procession ended.

Try telling people "My car tells lies" and see how they look at you.