Conkers, monkey nut shells and other items that don't compost
I got really excited this weekend because after three years, I finally turfed out one of the compost bins.
I stood in the back yard with my hands clasped to my face as my husband shook the bin from its resting place; deep down I was worried that instead of the expected nice brown crumbly mixture, we would have some sort of sludge.
As it happens it looked great and I felt extremely proud.
"Wow kids, look at this" I urged two disinterested faces.
Prodding it around with a gardening fork however uncovered some long forgotten remnants from the kitchen.
Here is a list of things that didn't compost:
Conkers - there were hundreds of these - my husband sheepishly confessed to 'disappearing' our son's huge conker collection a couple of years.
The conkers were jet black so I guess they were composting albeit slowly.
Egg shells - I always threw these in the compost in halves, after having cracked them. Now I know why Steve Tinling, THE Compost Guru recommends chopping things up. The halves were intact. In future I shall make sure that these are crushed up well before going in the bin as well as chopping other items down to size.
Monkey Nut Shells - I don't remember even buying these but after two-three years they looked perfect.
Compostable Cutlery - I was annoyed about this as I had paid over the odds for these and provided them to my children's school for the summer fete a few years back. I had then taken all the used plates and cutlery home and put them in the compost.
I am not sure how long they are supposed to take to break down but even a couple of years in the compost bin had made no impact on them.
Compostable fruit and veg bags from Sainsburys - admittedly when I started to pick these out of the compost they broke up very easily.
Tea Pigs - those funky teabags - I came across lots of these, the tea was no longer in them but the bags were as good as new.
A loaf of bread - eh!?????
Having now spread the compost over the raised bed in the back yard and picked out the bulky items, I still keep seeing egg shells and flaming conkers.
"Be sure your sins will find you out" I said to my husband as he tried to hide some of the conkers under the lavender bush to stop our son from discovering them and putting two and two together.
I realised that I am a bit too gung-ho when it comes to composting.
I throw everything in the compost bin, including loaves of bread as it turns out, in the belief that it will all break down and now I jolly well know that not everything does compost or at least some things take a bit longer than a few years!


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Anna
Didn't your grandma tell you that you must put a hole in the bottom of your eggshells, or scrunch them up, the witches will use them as boats and go out to sea and drown sailors.
An old superstition maybe, but not worth ignoring.
No, but my great grandma did tell me that if I didn't stop pulling at the fringe of her rug that the imps that lived under it would come and pull my nose hairs at night!
I didn't do it again and I probably didn't sleep that night either.