Recently by Anna Rebecca Mason
One woman's quest for beauty and youth got criminal this week. The woman, having just had a thousand pounds' worth of Botox done, bolted from the Newcastle clinic without paying.
The obligatory quips have been spouted upon news of the story, such as how the Botoxed receptionists struggled to register their surprise but alerted police.
Desperate measures, but I wasn't too surprised to hear this tale. It seems there's nothing we won't stop at in our struggle to hold onto youth, and treatments are getting more and more extreme.
Is any woman ever totally satisfied with her appearance? I think not, and the second most-criticised aspect (after body shape) seems to be hair.
In the club where I work there are loads of glamazon women, all shapes and sizes, and all great looking. Over the course of a night they trail into the dressing room and pick at their appearance. And I do the same.
Hairstyles are ever-changing, and a conversation about what to do with one's hair can last a good twenty minutes.
Biodynamic skincare is big news at the moment. Farmers who work this way match their sowing and harvesting to the seasons, stars, moon and sun.
I really love biodynamic brand Dr Hauschka, and find it quite funny that a beauty house with such a cult following hasn't sold out and still grows most of their ingredients on a farm in rural Germany.
Loving a quote from Donatella Versace last week.
''For me, natural has something to do with vegetables'' she said.
This thinking certainly seems to underpin Versace's glitzy make-up range; nothing natural-looking or understated about the gold logo emblazoned packaging there.
While the Miss Versace school of beauty is not one I'd sign up to in a hurry (she looks like she sleeps in a sunbed, removing her lips to use as a pillow), I have to say I admire the vivacity of the brand and
I, for one, am tired of hearing all about how certain things ruin our looks forever. So it was with glee that while penning a health article for an online publication that I uncovered a few interesting facts about a few things- things that I love, but have been given a slap on the wrist and told to avoid by the media, including those boring health magazines you find yourself leafing through in dentist's waiting rooms etc.
First- tea. Good old fashioned beloved builder's tea that is supposed to give us terrible cellulite, dehydrate us so our skin goes as wrinkled as a prune, and gives us bad breath.
I didn't have a hot Valentine's day date, nor indeed a man with whom to go out on this date, but it I had, I'm sure I would have been a difficult girlfriend. At least to buy for anyway, as I'm fantastically picky about perfume.
I'll let you in on a secret- I don't believe it's worth having facials, even though I regularly perform them in the spa where I work, part time. Eek!
Although I should be raving about the marvellous, transformative powers of these £50 plus treatments, I actually think they're a waste of money. It's not that having one is completely worthless, just more that you can attain the same results at home. If you look after your skin and use the right products, learning to adapt what you apply depending on what your skin needs that day, there shouldn't be any need for you to make that costly hours' appointment every month.
Getting ready for work at the club on Saturday night, I am faced with the task of making myself look lovely and feel lively when in reality I feel far from lovely and even further from energised.
What to do to transform into some glowing, glossy version of yourself, when all you really feel like doing is pulling on pyjama bottoms and curling up in a warm bed?
January and all is dead in clubland. I left the nightclub early on Saturday from my stint as Mrs. Massage and drove out onto the A1 to find the dual carriageway had morphed into one wide, white field.
Now is the time of year when the blanket seems to fall over our wild, indulgent Christmas excesses and we revert to a nation of frugality; spending, eating and drinking as little as possible. The only thing people will spend on, it seems, are expensive memberships to gyms and health spas. All the magazines are at it, full throttle: the 'New Year, New You' premise. No more partying; what we need is exercise and loads of it! Wheatgrass and brown rice, not wine and mince pies! Body-brushing, 2 litres of water a day; in other words, all diets, discipline and detox, and not a lot of fun.
So now that the feast is over (sort of), how best to shift the extra pounds and shake off that fug of lethargy that comes post Xmas? Myself, I can smugly confess to not having done much lounging around this past week. The scheduling of my son's fourth birthday party two days after Charistmas saw to it that I was mixing, beating, baking and preparing cakes, cookies and the rest of it in the kitchen instead of lying comatose watching Shrek re-runs and the like. Of course, with making party food comes a lot of tasting and eating, too.
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